My husband works shifts.
Every week he works a different shift, which means every 3 weeks he works graveyard. Lately it seems that when he’s on graveyard he has to work a 7-day work week.
Some may say, “Man! He needs to look for another job!” But with the current job market, we’re just grateful he has a job. And it is a good job.
But it is demanding. It is stressful. It is exhausting. And shift work comes with major health risks.
As each year goes by, I am more determined to make our home a haven of peace for him.
It’s hard sometimes because our kids are little and don’t understand the pressure of his job and the stress it brings on him.
But here are 5 ways I make my home a haven of peace
1. Keep a tidy home – I am pretty much a clean nut anyway. But with small children keeping the house clean is a challenge. So I opt for tidy. Every evening I pick up the toys and sweep the floors. Each morning I make our bed and each night I make sure the dishes are done. Apart from my usual weekly cleaning routine, I make sure these things are done daily. It really helps to keep our home free from stress.
2. Make sure the children’s needs are met – While my husband is really great about helping out around the home, I gladly accept my role as the one who primarily makes sure the children’s needs are met. I know that in these modern times a lot of moms want to go 50/50 here, but I believe marriage is 100/100. My husband gives 100% at work, and I give 100% at home. When he comes home, he needs a break, so I don’t expect him to come home and work some more.
3. Pray for him – My prayer lately has been “Lord, show me how I can bless my husband when he comes home. Show me how I can lighten his load and ease his stress.” But I also pray for his physical, emotional, and spiritual health. I have found “The Power of a Praying Wife” to be an excellent resource to teach me how to pray for my husband.
4. Don’t bombard him with stuff when he comes home – This is a huge weakness for me. I’ve been home all day with kids who’ve sometimes been cranky, or did cute things; I’ve received some shocking news and had no one to share it with, and I am extremely adult-conversation-deficient. However, my husband has been under pressure all day and had his boss breathing down his neck, dealt with dirty jokes and cranky co-workers. His brain needs a rest! One of the greatest gifts I can give him is remaining patient until he’s able to listen and receive.
5. Let him rest – One of the side-effects of Shift Work Syndrome (yes, this is an actual thing) is either insomnia or hypersomnia. We know what insomnia is, but we don’t really hear about hypersomnia, which is what my husband battles. Hypersomnia is when the body can’t ever seem to get enough sleep. Because his circadian rhythm is constantly interrupted, his body never really has an ebb and flow. Every week his sleep, meal and wake times change and every week his body has to adjust to a new cycle. So, I’ve learned to let my husband lay down and sleep whenever he wants for as long as he wants. He needs this. Badly! I never resent it when he sleeps more than me, or longer than me, because I know he battles constant fatigue that never seems to go away.
During the month of October, I am joining Courtney from Women Living Well and hundreds of women all over the world in making my home a haven. I am lighting my lovely Yankee Candle (a treasured gift from a friend in the States) to remind myself to pray peace over my home each and every day.
I blogged through this challenge last year, too. You can read the posts here: Making My Home a Haven 2014 Fall Challenge
If you’d like to join us, you can go here to read about this week’s challenge.
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