I am sometimes very shocked at what parents share about their kids on Facebook.
I sort of get it.
You’re at home all day. From the moment you get out of bed, your 3 year old has thrown fits, thrown food, ignored everything you’ve told him to do…
…he’s hit, kicked, spit and simply wont stay in time out.
You’re at your wit’s end, and need to vent.
All your mommy friends work and your husband can’t take calls while he’s on the clock. So you turn to the next best “ear” – Facebook.
You spew out a rant about your kids, maybe even throw a little humor in to diffuse the anger.
I will confess that I’ve done this a time or two.
But the thing is this…
Just because your kids are too little to understand the words your say, doesn’t make them right.
Just because they don’t know what gossip is, doesn’t mean it’s not gossip.
One of the downsides to our lives becoming so public is that our kids’ lives are often times more public than they should be. Just as you don’t like to broadcast your less than stellar moments, your children should have that same privacy. Their less than stellar moments shouldn’t be broadcast either.
The problem is that when we broadcast them, we’re not even giving them a choice as to whether or not they want the whole world to know about those moments when their actions were less than desirable.
Criticism doesn’t just happen to their faces, it often happens behind their backs. Both are equally damaging.
It happens offline, too.
I have sometimes sat with a group of moms and listened as it became a “air my kids’ dirty laundry” fest. It grieved my heart because these poor children were not given a choice to have their private lives remain private.
If we want our children to be respectful, they must feel respected.
May I take a moment and pass on a piece of advice my mom once gave me? She meant it in the context of marriage, but it is certainly applicable to our children, as well.
When you are in the company of others, choose to only speak about the good things your children do. Everyone around you should think your children are the most respectful, obedient, and well-behaved children around. Choose only to elevate them in the eyes of others.
In doing so, your children will feel respected, not only by you but by others as well.
And something miraculous will happen.
In your heart, as you purposefully only speak positive things about your children, your heart toward your children will begin to be more positive as well.
And your positive attitude will have a profound affect on your home.
Dear moms, the atmosphere in our homes is first determined by what is in our heart. When we fill our heart with positive things about our family, our heart overflows with joy and positive words come out of our mouths. As we speak positive and encouraging words to our family, joy and peace fill our homes.
It first starts with us.
During the month of October, I am joining Courtney from Women Living Well and hundreds of women all over the world in making my home a haven. I am lighting my lovely Yankee Candle (a treasured gift from a friend in the States) to remind myself to pray peace over my home each and every day.
I blogged through this challenge last year, too. You can read the posts here: Making My Home a Haven 2014 Fall Challenge
If you’d like to join us, you can go here to read about this week’s challenge.